Epiphany
I had an epiphany last night. I have done so much worthless thinking during my life. Some how in my mind I continued to be nice to my mother in the hopes that one day she would be nice to me in return. I realize now at the age of 28 that she will never change. No matter what good I do for her she will still not appreciate it. Worse yet even if she did something that others would think of as kind she would think of it as leverage, something that she can use to later get something out of me. You see what I have learned is that nothing, not even love comes for free with my mother. She can't just love me for being smart; she has to say she's smarter. She can't love me for being creative, because she will say she knows someone who's better than me. She can't feel bad when I am sick, because she doesn't care. My epiphany is that I don't care either. Why should I? Would you?
She's just a worthless nobody who wants me to feel as useless and miserable as she does these days and I am not going to let her do that to me. I have far too good of a life to let her keep coming back in and forcing this anchor on me. I will not go down like she did. I am stronger, smarter and a much better person.