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I am having a harder and harder time dealing with everyday stress. My main problems include the fact that I can’t handle driving far away from home, about 15-20 miles, by myself. I used to be able to drive anywhere at anytime and I enjoyed it. Now, I can’t stand to drive in the rain or when it gets dark outside. I have this other driving fear that is kind of crazy, I don’t like exits or sharp turns in the road. I have actually taken the long way many times just to avoid those spots in the road. If I do take the curves, I can’t seem to do it at a normal rate of speed. I sometimes try to go to doctor’s appointment and I either cancel them or I turn around halfway there because I am just too nervous to make the drive.

Along with that are my fears of being around a lot of people, or people I don’t know, and daily worries about my health, relationships and things that I have to do each day.

These are all supposed to be a simple thing for other people to do, or at least that is what my doctor and husband say. But for me it can be crippling. My hands start to sweat and my arms lock up sometimes when I am driving, I can’t stand to be in a crowded place or I feel like the whole place is spinning. I worry about what I will be like in a another year if these fears continue to get worse as they have been for the last few years.

My doctor has me on Zyprexa and Clonazepam; she says that the Zyprexa is the strongest stress medication on the market, so why do I still feel this way? Is there something really wrong with me? Something medication can’t fix? Will I ever be able to do the things that I used to do so easily?

In a phone call with my shrink last night, she said that I should be fine with just the Zyprexa and that I am taking a high dose of it too. She said that she is going to add Seraquel to my medication and see if that helps, but I have been on that before and I had some bad side effects. So, she is going to have to find something else. On of her suggestions was Ablify but I took that before too with no help and some side effects that I didn’t like.

I need a new medication because I am also having trouble sleeping again. I assume it is related to stress but I just can’t sleep. I lay down at night an a just lay there thinking about all of the things that are going on around me and in my life. It seems to take hours before my brain settles and lets me go to sleep. I have tried over-the-counter medications that are supposed to work but nothing.

I really think I should right a letter to my psychiatrist and explain to her all of the problems that I am having. In all of the time that I have been seeing her we never really talked about any of these problems in depth. She has always wanted me to talk about my family and the stress that they cause me. And there is only so much you can get out in a 15-minute appointment.

I wish nothing more then to just get in my car and drive like a friend suggested. I used to love to drive and travel, bt now I feel happier and safer staying at home., in my pajamas. I have dreams of doing things but I don’t think I can overcome this fear without changing my medication or some kind of serious therapy.

I guess I am just really screwed up, I know that I am not acting like a normal, rational person by feeling this way. And for once, I wouldn’t mind being a little bit more normal.

Right now, I don’t know what I am going to do. I am going to try to work on it and I guess that is all I can do for now.

Posted by Kelle at 12:32 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

It is finally happening, my surgeries are scheduled for June 1st. They are going to start with my right knee and my right shoulder. The right knee is actually getting surgery and the right shoulder is getting a cortisone injection.

I am both excited and nervous at the same time. I am going to be put to sleep for the whole thing so that is good at least. Hopefully, if the right knee gets fixed I will be able to walk more/longer after just a few months of physical therapy. I haven’t been able to walk more then about 15-30 minutes without having to sit down for the last 2 years or more. It got worse with my ankle but my knees are really bad.

I found out that the problem with my ankle is that they are weak. I have something called hyperflexablity that makes my joints bend further then they should. It like being double jointed, it just not as cool as I used to think it was. I guess it’s a neat party trick if I need it.

During the time that I am out in the surgery, they are also going to give me a shot of cortisone in my right shoulder. This is suppose to help me with my pain an make it feel a little better until I get that surgery done. I heard that the cortisone shot is very painful so I am glad they are doing it while I sleep. I was really afraid to get it done before. I am hoping that it will help with the pain and that I will be able to sleep a full night again or wake up without pain for awhile but the doctor isn’t guaranteeing anything.

The problem with my shoulders is actually a kind of birth defect of sorts (much like my knees) and the bone has grown into hooks on the ends of my shoulders. This is causing constant bursitis and muscle tearing. The bone “hooks” are going to have to be taken off and then the bursitis will stop and the muscles will heal eventually. I don’t know how long I will have to wait for my next surgery though.

I guess the most important thing about all of this is that I am finally getting it done. I have been waiting over a year for these surgeries and the time has finally come. I am not sure how long apart they are going to be are how long physical therapy is going to take for each of them but I am pretty sure by the end I am going to be able to do all of the things that I have waited so long to do.

Posted by Kelle at 12:32 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Today is Mother's Day. I am very happy because I actually got to celebrate my day last night. I am not a patient person so I somehow managed to convinced my husband that Mother's day dinner and opening gifts on Saturday was better then waiting until Sunday. I don't know how I did it really.

I was very happy with everything that I got for Mother's Day. Nothing was really that expensive, that I know of. I got a lot of stuff for doing scrap-booking and some office supplies, a keyboard try so I can clear off my desk and use it for scrap-booking and a new light for over my desk that Jemal is going to have to install sometime today (but he is still upset about installing the keyboard tray, so I don't know if he will get to the light today or not).

Last night's dinner was Outback, take-away. I ordered the 3 lobster tail dinner and Jemal ordered an extra lobster tail with his dinner for me. I ended-up getting a really bad headache half-way thru dinner so I didn't get to finish my lobster, but I will certainly try to eat it for lunch today. The kids both enjoyed heir dinners as well, Sierra got ribs and Jared got Grilled Cheese with Broccoli. Jemal of course got the steak. We even got GG to eat dinner with us.

I am just so happy with this Mother's Day. I asked for exactly what I wanted and that is exactly what i got. I was surprised at how well Jemal and the kids did at picking out the stuff I wanted for scrap-booking but they did a great job. Now, I am looking forward to spending the rest of the day working on my scrapbooks if I get a chance. I am sure that Jemal will let me since it's Mom's Day and all. I get to do some organizing (which is something that I love to do) and play with my new stuff.

Right now Jemal is off to McD's to get me my favorite breakfast. After that I am probably just going to do nothing for the rest of the day. I don't have to do my chores for the day, Jemal will do them for me. How great is that!?!

Today is going to be a very good day I think. Just relaxing, watching some TV maybe (Survivor finale is on tonight) and working on my scrapbooks. I don't have to worry about taking care of the kids or making dinner, doing laundry or anything like that.

I hope all of my mommy friends and family are being treated to a special day today. It's a time to put your feet up and have someone rub them for an hour or so. The one day of the year when you get to clock out and take some vacation time. So, use it, every minute and wisely. You only get this opportunity once a year so take full advantage of it.

As for me I am already so happy that I can't imagine asking Jemal or the kids to do anything more for me today. I just want some quiet time. Just to work with my books and play with my new toys. I couldn't ask for a better Mother's Day, really.

My only hope is that by next year my surgeries will all be done and we can all go somewhere special for Mother's day with the kids where everyone can have some fun. We used to go to Hershey Park for Mother's Day, but I haven't been able to for the last couple of years. Once my surgeries are done I am going to start planning all kinds of things that we can go and do together that we haven't been able to in so long.

Right now, Jemal and I have already figured out that he is going to be taking the kids alone at least to one place this summer. There is no reason for them to be stuck inside just because I can't go to the amusement parks and walk around, it would be really unfair to them. I hope we can find some things that they will enjoy and that won't be too hard on Jemal having both kids alone for a whole day.

Time for me to get started with my relaxing and enjoying my day, Hope you all are too.

Posted by Kelle at 08:45 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I recently found out from my PCP (primary care physician) that my blood test came back with a very low sodium reading. It was because of this that my psychiatrist decided along with my PCP that I should go off of the Trileptal.

I have tried to do this many times in the past because I just didn’t think the medication was right for me but I had a lot of problems doing it. My shrink said to do it cold turkey, this bothers me since she knows that I have had withdrawal problems in the past but she says that my sodium levels are too low to wait any longer. Who knew you needed salt so badly?

Well, last night was awful, I couldn’t sleep but a couple of hours at a time and I think I got up around 6 this morning for no reason at all. My whole body has been tingling all over and it is not exactly painful but it is at the same time.

This is not the kind of pain you have from bone injury or childbirth but it feels like your weak all over. Like if you have ever been really dehydrated, that whole body pins and needles feeling that you get all over.

Hopefully, this will get better quickly. If I remember correctly, last time I lasted 6 or 7 days like this and I had to get back on the pills cause I just couldn’t take it anymore. I am just going to have to get plenty of rest over the next few days and hope that it gets better with time.

I am not sure that the pills were that good for me to begin with. I don’t know if she plans to put me on a replacement or not but she is looking into whether or not the Topamax is causing my hair loss problems.

Posted by Kelle at 10:55 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Paying Bills and Dealing with Money

Paying and keeping up with bills is a tricky thing to do especially with credit cards and car payments. I have found a no hassle, no mess easy way to organize bill and keep them all paid and up to date without ever getting another late charge.

The first thing that you need to do is get your bills organized. I have found a great little bill organizer that I got from Staples and it works great and it organizes the bills from January to December. It’s just called “Home Finances” and Day Runner makes it. The great thing about it is that you can either store it at the end of the year and keep the files for future reference (up to 7 years for the IRS) or you can just not use the writing area and reuse the book over and over each year. (Another simple way is to just get a 3-hole punch and 12 notebook dividers. You can make your own out of a 2-inch 3-ring binder. You might even like that better. )

Once you have your bills organize, you have to keep it that way. It doesn’t mean that you have to put your bills in as soon as they come in but have a basket or bin that you collect them in. Open them, look at them, throw out the trash that comes with them and put them in your bin (Having a stapler handy is also a good idea so you can keep muti-page bills together and in order).

There are not many steps to the bill paying process but it can be tedious, in the end, though it will be the best thing you ever did for yourself. You will need a Bank with online banking and checking to do your bills this way, it is worth it to find a different bank if yours doesn’t do this. Trust me, it will save you time, money, and energy by just scheduling your bills online (not with the account holders). You will be able to cancel payments when you have to but they will all be ready to go every payday.

• Call Utility Company and get on the Budget Billing program (where they charge you the same amount each month) and find out what that amount will be.
• Find all of your bills and figure out what half of your normal cost is each month.
• Log on to your banks website and set-up an account for each of your bills, including car, credit cards and house payments.
• You want to set up an automatic payment for half of your monthly amount every payday (every two weeks or the days of the month you get paid)

Once the account has been set up, all you need to do is check on it once a month. Also in my account I set up account transfers to my savings. You can do the same and put a little bit of money into the savings account every payday and have something for a rainy day.

Using this process you will know exactly how much money will be coming out of your account every payday, because it will always be the same. Meaning you will have the same amount to spend every payday as well. And with car, credit cards and house payment, you will actually pay them off faster if your paying every 2 weeks. When you first start you will have to send in a double payment possibly to pay off the current bill and then begin the new one or start at the beginning of the month. Then there will be times when you have a credit for your utilities and such and you can skip a payment and do something fun with that money. You will never be late with a bill again though, and your credit will skyrocket, just make sure you’re paying a little more then the minimum in both payments.

Something else that my husband and I did was to chose one of our credit cards each and we use them as our personal cash card. We use our “allowance” (it is good to give yourself a set amount of money each payday to spend on yourself, and not to overspend. It makes you feel good but protects you from being broke at the end of the week) to pay the bill and we have some spending money.

We have 3 kinds of money in our house our “allowance”, the Bank or House money (money that can only be used for household things like groceries and things like that) and Credit. We try not to use the credit (unless it’s our card because that gets paid every 2 weeks) except for big purchases that we have to get, like airline tickets or appliances. We want to use the credit but we don’t want kill us either.

I hope that this helps you in some way, if you have any questions or I didn’t explain things quite clearly enough just comment and I will respond joyfully with advice on how to do this. It was the best thing that I did for my stress and my family by getting rid of the money worry in our lives. You can do the same.

Posted by Kelle at 09:32 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

(I started writing this on Saturday but I got too stressed to write anymore and now I am finishing it on Sunday.)

Yesterday was a very bad day for the Hogan/Barton family. My mother, brother and father all had court on the same day, but for different things in different places. Maybe it was just Karma day, I don’t know. It was a very stressful day for me to say the least. I was getting phone calls every 15 minutes and I was trying to help everyone with their problems. This is something I should be avoiding but under the circumstance, I felt that I had to and that it was my family so I really had no choice. I wanted to help my brother as I always do and my mother just seemed helpless and in need of some kind of help and ides. As for my father, I don’t really care what happens to him at this point anything is better then having him on the streets, being drunk and calling me all of the time.

Let us begin with my brother’s story, since he has the worst of it all. The night before court he went to the hospital where they found a blood clot in his head. They wanted to keep him in the hospital but he had to go to court, so he left. They also needed to do a CAT scan but because of a power surge, their machine was down and the next closest one is 2 hours away. He can’t afford to drive that far since gas is $3.00 a gallon and he is unemployed. It would cost him about $50 to get there and back. Not to mention the fact that he doesn’t have any health insurance and he is worried about how he is going to pay for all of this.

After he left the hospital he went to pick up his prescription and he took one of the pain pills before he went to court because he hurt so bad, even though I thought it would be a bad idea for him to be high while he is in the courtroom. I don’t know all of the specifics of the court case but the final order of the court was that he had to complete his LSI (this is some kind of program the DA uses to determine how to charge and possibly make deals with him based on his and his families criminal history) by the 19th of May or he will have to serve the full sentence. The reason the judge was so upset is because Jayson missed his first appointment with LSI and they thought he wasn’t realizing how serious his crime and the sentence were. The problem here is that the next available appointment with LSI is on the 22nd and there is no possible way that I could get him a sooner meeting, even explaining his circumstances.

After Jayson told me what had happened and how upset he was, I was worried about him because he said he would just kill himself if he had to go to jail. Plus, all of the things that are medically wrong with him I tried to come up with some kind of hope for him. The only thing that we could think of was for him to go to the LSI office every morning and wait for there to be an opening or for someone to take pity on him and see him. Hopefully, this plan will work and he will get to see someone before the 19th. If not he will probably be going to jail for at least a few months if not a few years, the time he is facing is 10 years and the judge isn’t happy with him.

Needless to say, I am worried about my brother, I really don’t want to see him go to jail because he is stupid and forgot his appointment. He forgets these things all of the time. I don’t think that there is anything else that I can do to help him though. I also in my mind think that jail for a few months might shock him into straightening up. On the other hand sending him to jail for 10 years would only make him worse in the end.

(Update: My brother went to the hospital Saturday night and had a CAT scan done and they found nothing wrong. What he has is stress migraines, they gave him medicine for it, and now the pain is better.)

To tell you about what happened to my mother yesterday I must explain the story, I will try to do it in as few words as possible. I have told the story of how my mother became the guardian of a woman named Bonnie, she is kind of crazy and old, she is also the girlfriend to my uncle Chuck. My mother says that Chuck was abusing Bonnie and so she filed for a restraining order against him for Bonnie, but when they went to court two weeks later Bonnie said she wanted to be with Chuck. So, the court took Bonnie out of my mom’s care and gave Bonnie to Chuck.

A couple of weeks passed and Chuck filed to evict mom from Bonnie’s parents’ house. My mom thought that the judge would not grant the order but he did. However, my mom had previously had Bonnie sign over the house, car and all other possession that were in her parents’. The estate would be my mother’s as soon as the papers were final. That could be 60 days from now but when that happens, my mother will own everything completely and there is nothing they can do about it. Someone might suggest that Bonnie wasn’t sane when she signed everything over to my mother but my uncle Chuck isn’t that smart I don’t think.

So, my mother ultimately has to move out by Sunday at midnight. She has a place to go she says, but I don’t know who she is staying with. She says the lawyer is going to take the papers to the judge Monday morning and she should be able to move back in to the house in just a couple of weeks. I am not really worried too much about my mother, what I am worried about is her calling my grandmother and begging for money. My mother hasn’t had a job for over 5 years now.

My mom says that she is mentally unable to work. I know that she is crazy for sure but not so much that she can’t get a job. She is on disability anyway and gets a check every month from the government. It’s not going to be enough for her without getting all the money from Bonnie’s weekly check from the estate, Chuck gets that now. My grand mother is supported by a monthly check as well and can barley pay for the things she needs. I would have to put my foot down if I found out my mother was taking money from her again.

My father also had court yesterday. I don’t know the details because I am not writing to him anymore but I did call the jail because I wanted to know if he was being released or not. The receptionist said that his bond had been raised to $25,000 and he has a new court date on May 30th. I am guessing that things did not go well and that he will have to wait for another day to have his case heard. Last time he waited 9 months, so I don’t have to worry too much about him getting out and calling me anytime soon.

My dad is better off in a place where they control his every move. He needs someone telling him what to do all of the time or he just gets drunks and ends up in jail anyway. I had sent him a letter explaining why I can’t deal with him anymore about a month ago. I may have written about it but I don’t remember. I just finally gave up on him. I realized that he doesn’t want to change and I don’t want someone like him in my life. So, I had to say good-bye to him. He wrote a letter back to me but it was all full of bible scriptures and he was talking about being the Son of God again, so I just couldn’t think anymore about it. I don’t think I will write to him or even read any more letters from him, it’s just not worth my time. I already wasted so much time, energy and money trying to have a relationship with my father that just wasn’t worth any of it.

Now that it is Sunday, I am a little more relaxed then I was on Friday. Friday was a very bad day for me. Some other things happened that day too that added to my stress but these are the worst things. I had my whole family dealing with jail or eviction and it looks like the other side one in all 3 cases. On top of that, I have my own medical problems to deal with and this weekend I have been very sick because of the stress. I tried keeping busy on Saturday but it only made me feel worse. I think I am going to spend the rest of today in bed or at least doing something relaxing. On Monday I have to start worrying about how my brother is going to get into the LSI office before his time is up.

Posted by Kelle at 09:21 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

I finally got around to seeing my orthopedist yesterday and I finally have a game plan for what he is going to do to fix me up and what exactly is wrong with me. It was a long wait in the doctor’s office. I saw a woman in her late 70’s at least with this wire thing attached to her hand that looked like something out of a horror movie and it scared me. I waited for about a half an hour before I went in to the actual patient room, where I didn’t get to see the doctor, instead I saw an assistant who asked me what I was there for.

I explained to the assistant that I had just fallen the day before, my ankle had given out on me again and I fell getting out of my car. This is about the 20th time that my ankle has just given out on me and caused me to fall down in some way. I also told her that the doctor at the pain management center found bone spurs on my shoulders and I think that is what has been causing me so much pain for the last few years there. Then I talked to her about my knees and all the trouble that I have had with them and that I can barely walk through the grocery store without them hurting and having to sit down.

I had brought with me my MRI that was done of my shoulders and the x-rays that I had of my ankle that was done last year. She basically told me that doctors don’t actually look at that stuff, they want the x-ray reports. So, she was going to call and get those but I would have to wait. In the meantime, though she was going to have me get some x-rays done there. Lucky for me they have their own x-ray office just across the waiting room.

So, there I sat again, looking at the woman who should be in a horror movie for another 15-20 minutes before they called me in to have the x-rays done. I got my shoulders; knees and left ankle x-rayed this time. Then I went back into the waiting room and sat for about 30 minutes before they called me back again.

Finally, I got to talk to the doctor. When He came in I had a whole list of questions for him already typed up so that I wouldn’t forget anything and I would make sure that I didn’t have to come back again because I forgot something.

Lets start with my ankle, when my rheumatologist said that I had this hyper-lexia thing (can bend my fingers back further then most people) it also meant that I had weak tendons and ligaments. So, it’s not just some cool trick at parties. This means that my ankle is weak, and that is why I keep falling and keep injuring the same ankle because it is already weak and more injury is making it worse and harder to heal. The solution to this problem may be to put pins in the joint and then reinforce the tendons (magically, because I didn’t understand a word he said).

Hopefully, this can be fix at least in the left side because I have always had trouble with my left ankle. I love clogs, big thick, high, clogs but I haven’t been able to wear them for the last couple of years because I always seem to fall down in them. My ankle just falls over; there is no other way to explain it. I would be overjoyed to be able to wear my favorite shoes again.

Then there are my shoulders, I will try to explain this the best that I can. I was told by the Pain Management Center that I had bone spurs back in February I think it was. However, when Dr. House looked at the x-rays yesterday he said that what I have is actually a birth defect, hooks of some kind coming out of the shoulder bones. It looks kind of creature like on the x-ray.

The “hooks” are causing me to have recurring bursitis and tearing of the rotator cuff. He says that he can go in and remove the hooks and that should make the pain go away, most of it anyway but there has been a lot of muscle damage done already and there is inflammation around all of my joints as well. It will take a few months of physical therapy to recuperate from the surgery but I think afterwards I will be better off. Then hopefully I will have no more pain in my shoulders and I won’t have trouble carrying my purse anymore.

Finally, my knees, they are a big problem that I have been dealing with since I was about 14 (that’s the first doctors record that I have). There is a tendon on the side of each knee that is pulling them outward, which means that the knee cap is being rubbed down to nothing from being in the wrong position and it hurts like hell to walk too long or go up and down stairs.

The way to fix this is to cut the tendon that is pulling the kneecap out of place and then wear knee braces for awhile until the kneecap goes back into it’s natural position. This also will take some physical therapy and months of it. I am not worried about that though because I just want to get it done.

The problem right now is that we have to wait to see what the rheumatologist is going to do. Dr. House says that she might prescribe something that makes my shoulders or knees hurt less and it would be easier to figure out where to start if we get rid of some of the inflammation first. Only thing is Dr. Ziminski isn’t a doctor who likes to give “labels” she said. So, I don’t know what she plans to do. I have asked them both to send faxes to each other in the hopes that it might make things go faster and that in 6 weeks when I go back to see Dr. House I can start scheduling surgeries.

It is also important though that Dr. Ziminski is able to diagnose and treat what she thinks is wrong with me too. However, maybe with some of the bone and muscle stuff out of the way, it might be an easier task then it is now.

I really don’t know what the best thing to do is, but I do want off the pain pills as soon as possible and the only way to do that is to have the surgeries done as soon as possible. Sometimes you leave this stuff up to the doctors and sometimes you have to try to make a choice that you think is a best for you. Dr. House was willing to schedule surgery yesterday but after he mentioned the possible changes with medication from the Rheumatologist, I agreed that I should see her one more time before making my final decision. I also wanted to talk to my husband first.

So, right now it looks like in at least 6 weeks I will be finally making the plans for my surgeries. It took long enough. I just didn’t know that the pain management center wasn’t going to be doing that and I stayed there waiting for them to do something. I could have already been through this but I guess it’s better late then never, right?

I will fill you all in later when we figure out which body part we are going to start with. I am going to suggest my knee and my shoulder on the right side at the same time. That way it won’t take me as long to get through it all and recover. This also means that we will have to put our house hunting plans on hold for at least another year. Sierra will be happy about that I am sure, she will get to stay near her friends this year for sure.

I have also realized that it is time to sit down with everyone in the house, including Sierra and Jared (if he will listen) and explain to them what will happen over the next few months, maybe year. I want to make sure that everyone is okay with me having these surgeries and is willing to deal with all of the extra responsibilities that come along with it. I know what this is going to mean to my family and what I have already put them through because of all of this. I will owe them so much when this is all over.

Posted by Kelle at 02:16 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Using Post-its to Keep Organized

This is a very quick tip that I picked up when trying to get things done around the house, with phone calls and with the many doctor’s appointments and lab tests that I have had to get done. It’s not good to run yourself ragged trying to do a million tasks in a day. I have Post-Its; they are like gold in my house. I use the small-unlined Post-Its to write down each thing that I need to do on individual post-its and I stick it to mirror that is beside my bed.

Why beside my bed? Because just before you go to sleep you always remember something that you have to do tomorrow and you might forget it by morning. So, I have the post-its there and the mirror and there you go! I never forget what needs to be done (It doesn’t mean I always do it). You could also do this with your fridge or bathroom mirror, or just the wall (the Post-It won’t hurt it, but you will need the Super Sticky small post-its if you want them to stick to the wall)

In the morning grab some Post-Its, the Super Sticky lined ones are the best for this, and write down only the # of things that will fit on the post-it, say 5-7things, that would be a good day. You also need to be careful of time, do you have time to do all of the things that you are putting on your list or can you trade some things out for something you were going to do tomorrow instead? Those are the things that must be done today and a few other things that if you have time you will get to them too. If you can accomplish all of those things then you have the rest of the day off. Don’t forget to include things like:

• Call Mom for Birthday
• Mail Bills or Pay Bills
• Check Email and respond to Friends/Family
• Vacuum House
• Take Kids to Park for an Hour
• Go to the Video Store
• Refill Prescriptions
• Make Doctor’s Appointments
• Laundry (separate wash/dry, fold and put away)

They may not seem like big things but they take up your time and energy, you can even put an estimated time next to them so that you can figure out if you have enough time to get them all done (say while the kids are at school). You need to include the small things in your list because they take away from what free time you have to yourself. This is something I am working on and I know how difficult it can be to try to do so many things in one day. Unless it’s something that you do to relax, it’s taking your energy to do it. You need to set boundaries for these things. Say that you can only give so many hours a day to other things and the rest of the time is yours and with your family.

You need time to yourself believe it or not. Just one hour a day, where you are not running around, on the phone or doing chores in time to relax and time to heal. Everyone needs this time. Without it, you will just make yourself exhausted and sick.

Then, at the end of the day before you go to sleep, remove the tasks that you have completed and add more stuff for the next day or following days. You won’t believe how you will feel when you do this. It really gives you a feeling of accomplishment. You’re actually getting things done and enjoying your day at the same time. You’re not exhausted like usual and things are getting done around the house and in your life without causing you stress. You will have time for yourself and your family at the end of the day and you will be happy with yourself over all.

Then the next day you can work on something new. Just do things the same way as before. Don’t think that because the day before you were able to do 7 things and still have free time that you should do 8 or 9 today. Keep the limit at 7 and you will find that you will be happy and so will your family. No chore is as important as a happy mom or dad. And doing too much just makes you stress and not able to function at the end of the day when the family is all together again.

Another tip, on the weekends, give everyone a chore Post-It, only 3 or 4 things for the young ones and for the adults 6 or 7 things that need to be done by the end of the weekend. No pressure, but it helps out the parent at home to get some weekly cleaning done with a little help from some extra hands. Just tell everyone they have until Sunday night to get the list done. That means no cleaning all day on Saturday or Sunday, just picking up here and there when they have the time. This also means less stress on the whole family and more time to do fun things with them on their days off.

I hope that I have helped in some way to give you a way to get organized and be a little bit less stressed about life. That is my goal after all. But remember I am no expert, I am just giving you the ideas that I came up with on my own and they work for me, that’s all I know.

Posted by Kelle at 12:45 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)