FreshCaffeine

One of the biggest things that he told me is that he wants to come back here to MD and live. He says that they will give him a free bus ticket if I just tell them that he is allowed to come and live with me. I said to him at least 10 times that he can’t live here with me, he can’t even spend the night once and he said hat he just wants me to tell them that so that they will give him a free bus pass back here to Maryland.

I don’t know what to think. My father sounded pretty good on the phone and I want so badly to believe him that he isn’t going to drink anymore and that he really wants to et his life together but I can’t fall back to doing all of those things I did for him before. I told him on the phone that I will disconnect the line if he starts to stress me out again because I just can’t take that after all of the progress that I have made since he went in to jail. I don’t want to go back to being sick every day.

Hopefully, my father will work hard to get his life together and then I won’t have to worry about him at all. Actually, I am not worrying about him now. He will either do something with his life or he will just continue to be a bum. Either way it doesn’t really have to affect me in anyway. If I continue to keep him at a distance (even if he moves back here) I will still be happy and healthy.

I do hope that he does well, but I am not going to get my hopes up. I am also not answering the phone for him except for once a week. I can’t take the stress of his life. He will have to understand that at some point. Maybe he does now after that letter I sent him but I am not giving in to him again. I have been doing very well without him and I can’t let him change that even if he does get better as a father.