I am 30!
As I thought on the day of turning 30 I don't feel as bad as I did several days ago. I got a lot of advice from friends and family that made me feel batter about it and they made me really think. There really isn't any change in me or who I am since yesterday and I can do all the things I did yesterday. I even decided to be a little more wild with my clothes and other things. I don't have to be dressed down or the soccer mom that I thought I was going to have to be from now on. I am very happy that I realized that.
I decided to do some online shopping today for some very crazy hippy clothes that I think are my style. I don't care what people think of me now. I can be who I want to be, I have earned that right now. I have put in 30 years of work to get to this point and I deserve it. I can still do all the things that I wanted to do, I can still do art and be happy with what ever I accomplish in the next 30 years. And who knows I might even find the time (now that I am healing from the things that have been wrong with me for the last 6 years) to do something spectacular with my free time.
I can't wait until I am healed enough to go out into the world again. It seems like it has been so long since I have been able to enjoy the simplest things in life. I am noticing though that even the small things are making me feel better. Like this morning I got a phone call from my best (and only) friend along with my wonderful aunt wishing me a happy birthday and it just made me smile so big. It was so nice of them to think about me so early in the morning. The card I got from my in-laws yesterday made me feel wonderful and started my thoughts of how 30 isn't really so bad.
I just want to say thank you to everyone who contributed to my feeling better about being 30 and to everyone who already wished me a happy birthday.It really meant a lot to me. It also made this year a special year for me and I promise I won't complain about getting older until I am at least 45. Well, maybe 40.